Near the end of 2006, the Internet told me to go buy a Wii. The Internet said that it would be fun, and that it would offer me new experiences that could not be re-created on other consoles. "People will like you," said the Internet. "You want people to like you, don't you?" It is true: I do want people to like me. It is important to me that the Internet approves of my decisions. And so, under the guidance of my one true friend, the Internet, I purchased a Nintendo Wii. The Internet did not mention that within a few months I would be using this device to cut into a man's heart. Damn you Internet! How could you not warn me? And damn you Atlus; damn you for developing a fun and quirky medical-themed arcade puzzler.

The daze of our lives

   Trauma Center: Second Opinion poses as a sequel, when it is really just the original with a fresh coat of paint, not unlike a young boy putting on lipstick and heels and claiming to be his own big sister. The storyline (still) follows the emerging medical career of one Derek Stiles. Stiles is an up and coming surgeon with a lot to learn about surgery, and about life. He and his plucky young assistant Angie fight to save lives and punch disease in the face.

   The story is rife with melodrama that would not feel out of place on prime-time TV. Themes weave through suicide attempts, bio-terrorism, euthanasia, and inter-office canoodling. While the storyline itself feels current and topical, the delivery is quite dated. Static images accompany scrolling text like an RPG for the SNES. The pain of reading [I usually get this one in my left leg - ed.] is exacerbated by the fact that the game is almost too chatty. Before each surgery there is dialogue with storyline development. There is also a longer dialogue scene between each surgery. This means that for each minute that is spent with a scalpel, two more are spent reading about it [sounds like ER : The E-book - ed.]. Just give me something to suture already. Moreover, the themes are very dark, even with a T rating. I guess I figured that a surgery game with cartoon characters would be more childish, like game where you play as Scalpy, the surgery clown, and people's intestines have been replaced by balloon animals. That would be awesome.

Spirited away

Join the five-step program

   Most of the missions are some derivation of the first one. The formula is as follows. Wipe the wound with an all-purpose healing gel (which I will call Tussin). Then cut along the dotted line. Once inside, locate, laser, tweeze, and cut out the problem. If the patient's vital signs should drop, simply fill a syringe with more Tussin, and give them a warm blast of life [or choose the kick in the stomach - ed.] before continuing to work. When finished, sew the cut up with your needle and thread. Then wipe it with Tussin and place a bandage. Voila. Just like new.

   The early stages feel very "medical": healing wounds, excising tumors, removing foreign objects. As the game progresses, however, the challenges begin to feel more arcade-like. A few puzzles, and abundant use of the laser to fight disease, make it clear that the designers ran short on "medical" ideas after a while.

   The graphics are (thankfully) unrealistic. The characters are all hand-drawn in anime style. The bodies and vital organs are rendered in three dimensions in soft, muted tones. There is little to no blood, and nobody ever dies. If a player fails a mission, a senior doctor simply takes over. Overall the game looks very nice, despite the fact that it can only display at 480i.

   Despite the few downfalls, Trauma Center Second Opinion is absolutely a game worth playing. It provides a surprisingly developed story with fun game mechanics that offer a glimpse of what is possible on the Wii. Hopefully, this game will usher in a new generation of medical simulators. I know that I have already pre-ordered my copy of Dr. Mario, proctologist.

       ... Phr4nk