While there are over a dozen characters to unlock by playing through Story Mode, and dozens more that can be purchased in-game after you've defeated them in story mode, almost all of these characters fall into a handful of basic classes. Each of these classes has particular skills that you'll need to solve various puzzles or access secret areas. Blaster-packing guys can use grappling hooks on special symbols to reach higher areas, Jedi can double jump and use the Force to manipulate objects, Imperial characters can open special Imperial doors, and midget characters (think Jawas and Ewoks) can crawl through extra-demeaning, doggy-door-looking hatches. There are a number of other classes too, and even some dual-class characters, like Boba Fett, who can utilize thermal detonators like other bounty hunters, but can also use a jetpack to hover for short distances like an astromech droid. And if you just can't find a character you're happy with, the game allows you to create two of your own from scratch and gives you a pretty extensive set of parts to do so. [Or you can create one character, but with two sets of testicles. It's well worth it. - ed.]

I am your father's uncle's brother's best friend's roommate!

   Being able to utilize the various abilities of your team members in conjunction with each other is vitally important to your success in the game. For instance, you might need to use the force to dig up the materials for a grappling-hook pad. Once you've built the pad, you could use your gun-dude to grapple up to a lever that lowers a bridge to allow your Jedi character to regroup with you. Or you could just run around using Force-choke to kill Jawas. I hate those little bastards.

   There are also a number of vehicle levels where the player is piloting an X-Wing, a Snowspeeder, or even the beloved Millenium Falcon. While these levels have their moments, overall they're much less satisfying than the on-foot levels, mainly because they lack the same level of exploration [no, you can't explore Uranus! - ed.]. Granted, they're definitely a step-up from the fast, confusing vehicle levels from the first Lego Star Wars, which were essentially rail-shooters, as those in Lego Star Wars II do allow backtracking and veering off onto side paths, but they still don't have any of the puzzle solving or quirky secrets that can be found in almost all of the pedestrian levels. Oh well. All of the Star Wars aerial battles have been done to death in video games anyway.

I am a Lego dude, like my father before me

   The real fun of the levels in Lego Star Wars II comes after you've finished them in Story Mode, at which point you can replay them in Free-play Mode, utilizing any of those characters you spent hours painstakingly unlocking, including any you unlocked in the first Lego Star Wars (providing you purchase the option during the game). I tell you, nothing's sweeter than a Mace Windu/IG-88 combo for kicking ass and taking names in Echo Base! Re-playing some levels in Free-play Mode nearly doubles their sizes, as you'll have more abilities at your disposal than you would in Story Mode. This is also the way you'll find many of the game's collectible items, such as red power blocks that unlock special abilities for purchasing, and minikits, which can be assembled into vehicles viewable outside the Cantina. There are an ungodly number of secrets in this game (and an awful lot of them wind up being bizarre hot tubs full of Stormtroopers in speedos), but clever players won't have too hard of a time tracking them all down.

   Actually, one aspect of the game that could be viewed as a negative is that it is really, really easy. In fact, it's essentially impossible to lose. And I don't mean you have to be really crappy at it to lose. I'm talking, even if you're Sucky McSucksalot from Sucksville, Iowa (the suckiest of states), you literally cannot get a Game Over in this game. Dying, whether it's by getting your ass blown away, or toddling off a cliff like an overly ambitious lemming, simply results in a loss of some of your collected funds (in the form of silver, gold, and blue Lego studs) and your near-instant re-materialization close to where you met your unfortunate demise. So even if you sit there for four-and-a-half hours leaping to your doom off of the highest point in Cloud City, the worst that'll happen to you is that you'll wind up really poor. [Unless you are a Lego investment banker, in which case the worst thing that'll happen to you is that you'll just waste four-and-a-half hours leaping to your doom off the highest point in Cloud City - ed.]

   Granted, it's really the puzzle solving and the item hunting that is the backbone of this game, not tricky jumps or battling foes. In fact, the combat is incredibly simplistic, so much so that even your Luddite of a grandmother could drop fools like a gangsta. The auto-aim, especially for guys with guns, is so good that you usually just have to point your guy in the right direction and their attacks will land. Plus, as long as you stand still while you rapidly pound the attack button, you'll auto-dodge incoming attacks too. That's about it. Blaster characters do have a melee attack for when an enemy gets close (including Chewbacca's much-talked-of ripping-off of enemy's arms), a welcome addition from the first Lego Star Wars, in which extra-close foes were harder to hit than even that wily jogger who continues to evade me during my morning drives to work.

The Dark Side beckons

   As I'm sure you've gathered by this point, overall I feel the game is great, but there are a couple other little flaws I feel are worth mentioning. For one, while your AI teammates will usually pick up the slack on puzzles that require pulling two switches simultaneously or some such activity, in battle they are essentially as brain dead as your average pop star. They'll blast away at the nearest enemy, regardless of whether or not there are allies in the way. Since friendly fire does hurt, this can become a real pain in the ass when close-range Jedi characters team up with guys with blasters. And even though they can totally fry your ass, I'm pretty sure none of their attacks can actually kill enemies. You've got to do your own dirty work. Also, while you do hone in pretty cleanly on enemies, if you're trying to bust open a piece of scenery to get at the sweet, sweet Lego studs within, your character will often brutally attack a nearby teammate instead, as if suddenly discovering a traitor [or a Lego suicide bomber - ed.] in their midst. Especially during some of the more cramped levels, I was really wishing for a way to turn off the friendly fire.

Use the Force, you mook!

   Even with those issues, though, if you love or once loved Star Wars, this is definitely the game for you. The gameplay will really take you back to your first awed experience of that galaxy far, far away, before it got all fat and bloated off of its own hubris, its continuous swelling paralleling (on only a slightly more galactic scale) the inflation of its creator's own neck. The cutscenes, many of which hilariously parody the corresponding scenes from the films, would make even the stoniest of Jedi Council Members snarf his Jedi juice box all over his pals in the Jedi cafeteria. And allowing a buddy to jump in for a little co-op whenever he's got a free moment and then quit back out without interrupting the flow of the game when he has to go help his mom change her colostomy bag is a festive flower in the game's dandy cap. It looks good, it sounds good, it's funny, it's got tons of unlockables, it's got great 2-player co-op action, and it's got tons of heart. You've dreamed of a game like this for so long fans. Run to it. Go!

   And those of you who have never seen a Star Wars movie? You sicken me. There's nothing for you here. Just leave.

       ... Mike Zeller