I was so busy rickrolling bitches yesterday that this little gem went completely under my radar. Now, I’m not a GIANT gamer dork, I mean I DID name my daughter Zelda and I DO write for a site named GameLemon, but I’m not a GIANT dork. Huge? Maybe. Still, when I watched the Legend of Zelda Movie Trailer on IGN, I went through the exact same thought processes the rest of you GIANT gamer dorks went through:

“Oh my holy crap Jesus with a crossbow. A Zelda movie. Oh. Presented by IGN? Since when does IGN present anything except ads for crappy Anime games masquerading as legitimate journalism? Never. Oh, but that Scottish dude is awesome! He seems like a real actor. And sort of hot. I’m kind of crushing on bald, Scottish Ren Faire dude!* Oh but the date is April 1st. I’ve been conditioned to mistrust anything connected with that date. Oh shit! Look out, Link. Shoot that spider thingie in the eye. Trust me, I’ve been there, man. Oh are those peahats? Wow! Okay, that date must be a coincidence. Oh joy. A movie based on OoT. I’m going to totally dork out. I might even show up in costume. Or not.** Oh…an upgraded Master Sword. Oh…Ganon has a fake beard. This piece of shit is so FAKE! Fake Trailer! Frailer! Frailer!”

Today the GIANT dork boards and blogs are a buzz with speculation…there are those of us who still think it was too well done to be a fake. Well, 1. IGN already fessed up. And 2. Yes, I agree. For an IGN prank…it was remarkably well-done. But for a balls-to-the-wall all-out bid for a massive amount of publicity for a lil ole movie company called Rainfall films…I think they could’ve looked a little harder for an actor with a red beard.

* Okay. I might have been alone on that particular thought.

** That one too.

Popular gaming blog Kotaku was struck by a strange malady today, deforming the face of the popular site and peppering it with ugly, repetitive headlines screaming “How XXX Makes Home Really, Really Cool”, with a different game name being substituted for XXX every time. Internet commentators suspect a strange new replicating virus, while people close to the situation have been heard whispering something about “common laziness”. When reached for comment, Kotaku editor MICHAEL MCWHERTOR, whose name appeared next to the suspect postings, refused to talk to us, but later sent us three empty emails with the subject line “Mike McWhertor makes Kotaku really really cool”. When we checked with our resident psychologist, the good doctor confirmed that these might indeed be symptoms of garden variety sloth. GameLemon has informed Kotaku senior editors of the situation, and wishes Michael a speedy recovery.

According to the guys at Kotaku Street Fighter IV is only half finished. Technically, Capcom still has till July, but that’s not a lot of time in game development years. What might Capcom do come those hot summer months and the game is still incomplete? The marketing machine cannot be stopped, the proverbial trucks are waiting to rush the game to hungry fans around the world and yet Ken still only has one working leg…

The answer? Paraplegic Street Fighter, of course! In a bold move, Capcom changes the title of the game at the last minute, and invalids around the world celebrate the first game ever featuring handicapped fighters!!! Crowds cheer as Chun Lee crawls into the ring on her powerful arms and Ryu swings a prosthetic leg above his head with his one good arm! And everyone is trembling in anticipation of Zangief’s new “Wheelchair Piledriver” move…!

And who makes the surprise character appearance, you ask? Why it’s Paraplegic Santa, of course! Tears of joy stream down his face and he shrugs off a flurry of attacks against his unfeeling legs and wacks Blanka on the head with his big bag of paraplegic Christmas presents! Boy, being hit with spare wheelchair parts sure gotta hurt!

Bravo Capcom, bravo!!!