Just watched Adam Sessler interview Ben “Yahtzee” Croshaw at part of G4s GDC coverage. Good to put a face to the voice, Mr. Ben. I must congratulate you, you actually look like a borderline normal human being. Fucked in the head to just about the right degree, I mean. And not, like, ridiculously old and groggy. Good for you.

As for Adam, Sessler, man, you just look so cute trying to be a real journalist! Good try, my man, good try. But you’ve really gotta learn to control your chin if you want to take this whole journalism thing seriously. Use your will power - keep it from nodding and jerking and reaching out like a young virgin’s clitoris at the sight of manmeat when you are talking to people. Face control, man, FACE control. Take some lessons from Morgan. Who, I must admit, needs to take some lessons from you in the dressing department. They dressed her ok for the GDC for a change, but her stylists really need to understand how to NOT put long, tight, one-piece cloth tubes on her midsection that make her look like a human spaghetti. Seriously.

Well, it’s official, Gears of War 2 is coming exclusively to the Xbox 360 in November. Yes, this November. Yes, I know that’s still a pretty freaking long time away. Use it to starve yourself and save up for that new HDTV. Read up on the 120Hz technology, while you are at it. Gaming gods demand nothing less.

As previously announced, Fable 2 is also on the horizon, and, as just unveiled at the GDC, this time around you’ll be able to play a pregnant woman. Ok, so not necessarily in that order - you can play a woman, and THEN she can become pregnant. No labor mini-game is in the works, though. Good thing too - having just watched my wife deliver a baby a month and a half ago I can only shiver uncontrollably as I imagine what that horrendousness could have looked like.

In other news, MS also announced that people will now be able to publish their games on XBL via a peer review process. It’s called XNA Creator’s Content. Hmm, no labor mini-game for Fable 2…. ability to publish own games on XBL… no labor mini-game in Fable 2… ability to publish own games on XBL… Geez, are you thinking what I am thinking? Talk amongst yourselves while I go warn my poor wife to never ever visit XBL again….

Well, hello! Welcome to our humble blog - and yes, that special tingling you are getting in your tummy now is the feeling of priviledge for being privy to our very first official post ;). We are still working out a few quirks with the blog, so please be patient while we make our first batch of blogging lemonade. Meanwhile, we’d like to say ‘thanks’ just for coming to visit, and we look forward to sharing some quality laughs with you, as we make brutal fun of everything ‘gaming’ under the sun. Game announcements? We can make them funny. Red ring of death stories? Yep, funny. People getting electrocuted while peeing on their PS2? That one hardly even needs any help from us. People making contact with extraterrestrial intelligence through their Nintendo Wiis? We’ll make you see the humor in it even if it’s a total load of BS. Oh yeah, we are allowed to say ‘total load of BS’ here. We can say ‘boobs’, too, btw. We are even allowed to say that “Kane & Lynch” blew chunks the size of Manhattan. You can’t get fired for honesty here. Just for writing posts that are way longer than they need to be. See you around!