According to the guys at Kotaku Street Fighter IV is only half finished. Technically, Capcom still has till July, but that’s not a lot of time in game development years. What might Capcom do come those hot summer months and the game is still incomplete? The marketing machine cannot be stopped, the proverbial trucks are waiting to rush the game to hungry fans around the world and yet Ken still only has one working leg…

The answer? Paraplegic Street Fighter, of course! In a bold move, Capcom changes the title of the game at the last minute, and invalids around the world celebrate the first game ever featuring handicapped fighters!!! Crowds cheer as Chun Lee crawls into the ring on her powerful arms and Ryu swings a prosthetic leg above his head with his one good arm! And everyone is trembling in anticipation of Zangief’s new “Wheelchair Piledriver” move…!

And who makes the surprise character appearance, you ask? Why it’s Paraplegic Santa, of course! Tears of joy stream down his face and he shrugs off a flurry of attacks against his unfeeling legs and wacks Blanka on the head with his big bag of paraplegic Christmas presents! Boy, being hit with spare wheelchair parts sure gotta hurt!

Bravo Capcom, bravo!!!

This entry was posted on Friday, February 22nd, 2008 at 1:23 pm and is filed under Fake News. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.